Gifts for a New Baby: Who Are You Really Giving To?

New baby gifts by category

First, work out who the gift is really for

For the baby: what really gets used in the first year

• Clothes in a six-month size, not newborn
  Parents get newborn onesies from everyone, and the baby outgrows them before they've even been washed. Buy sizes that will fit at around six months, and check which season they'll land in — a winter snowsuit in a summer size is no use at all.
• A sleeping bag instead of a doona
  Pillows, doonas, cot bumpers, loose blankets and soft toys don't belong in the cot — the UK's NHS lists them among the things that raise the risk of sudden infant death. A baby sleeping bag does the same job as a blanket and can't slip over the baby's face. Choose it by tog rating and room temperature; the recommended temperature for a baby's room is roughly 16 to 20 °C.
• Muslin wraps in what looks like far too many
  They work as a change mat, a pram shade, a burp cloth and a light cover. They're always in the wash and parents never have enough — which makes them one of the few gifts that's fine even as a duplicate.
• Things for carrying and getting about — but ask first
  A wrap, a carrier, a footmuff or a rain cover for the pram get used every day, but they have to suit that particular pram and that particular Mum — only buy them after asking. A carrier bought blind is the classic gift that ends up on a secondhand marketplace.
• A toy for little hands, not for the shelf
  In the first months a baby responds to contrast and sound, not detail: a cloth book, a rattle, a teether. Put toys labelled 3+ aside — what to avoid when buying for the littlest ones is a topic of its own, and the age label on the box isn't a suggestion, it's safety information.

For Mum after the birth: a gift that eases the first weeks

• Food you can eat with one hand
  Home-cooked portions for the freezer, soup, cut-up fruit, nuts by the bed. In the first six weeks you eat standing up and one-handed, because the other hand is holding the baby. Arrange the drop-off in advance and don't stay for a visit — handing the bag over at the door is part of the gift.
• An hour that someone else spends with the baby
  A babysitting voucher written on paper works better than "let me know if you need anything" — that offer never gets used. Write a specific time: I'll come on Thursday morning and you go and have a lie-down.
• Things that help with breastfeeding
  A feeding pillow, nipple cream, a big water bottle with a straw, nursing bras. The WHO recommends exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months, so for lots of mums feeding is everyday work — and a gift that makes it easier hits exactly the right spot. Don't buy formula or bottles as a gift, though: that's the parents' decision, not the visitor's.
• Something that isn't "for the baby"
  A body wash that doesn't smell like a chemist, a book you can read a paragraph at a time, headphones for night feeds. A gift with no teddy bear on it anywhere is a reminder that this person existed before the birth too.
• A voucher with a long expiry
  Hairdresser, massage, beauty treatment — but with a long expiry and no catches. A voucher that runs out during the first six weeks is a gift that leaves nothing but a guilty conscience.

For the whole family: a keepsake nobody can make in a year

What gets used and what ends up in the box

What to write on the gift card: lines to copy

How to choose a gift when you only know the parents a little

1. 1
   Find out whether it's their first

   With a first baby the essentials are missing and practical things are welcome. With a second or third, most things are already at home from the older sibling — that's where a keepsake, food or babysitting wins.
2. 2
   Pick a recipient and stick to it

   Decide whether the gift is for the baby, for Mum or for the family. Three small gifts from three categories feel scattered; one well-thought-out gift from one category is the one people remember.
3. 3
   Check the size and the season

   For clothes, work out which month the baby will be in that size, and check whether it'll be winter or summer then. This is the most common reason a gift still has the tag on.
4. 4
   Check safety, not looks

   In Australia a mandatory safety standard covers toys for children up to and including 36 months of age (small parts and choking), and recalls are published at productsafety.gov.au/recalls. A toy withdrawn in the EU is not automatically recalled here, so check the Australian list. A handmade market-stall toy or a wooden decoration over the cot often isn't made with these rules in mind.
5. 5
   Add a specific offer of help

   On the card, write one thing you'll do: I'll bring dinner on Wednesday, walk the dog, babysit on Thursday. Hardly anyone uses a vague "let us know if you need anything" after a birth.

When to hand the gift over and how long to stay

Sources

• NHS: Reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) — What doesn't belong in the cot (pillows, doonas, cot bumpers, loose blankets, soft toys) and what the room temperature should be.
• WHO: Infant and young child feeding — The recommendation of exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months of life.
• ACCC: Product Safety Australia — recalls — Toy safety in Australia, the mandatory standard for toys up to 36 months and the list of recalled products.
• American Academy of Pediatrics: Safe Sleep — Recommendations for safe infant sleep in the first year.